Girlfriend is goin' DOWN!

I wouldn't necessarily call myself a competitive person. I never really excelled at competitive sports (my poor mother who sat through two seasons of soccer games waiting to see if I made it off the bench can attest to this. Here's a hint: I didn't). I steer clear of Fourth of July pool volley ball games (where that same mother becomes a trash talking fiend). Truth be told, it is also a reason why I don't enjoy reality competitions like Top Model and Idol and the like (ignore for a moment that I adore project runway and gladiators), because I don't like seeing the monsters that people become when that competitive edge gets embedded deep into their soul.

However, I have come to realize that there are two major exceptions to my non-competitive state. 1) Sing Star and 2) Blogging.

Let's get that first one out of the way: I have only played it once, (ONCE!) but that was enough to make me dream about it at night and practice for in the car by day. Last night I dreamt that I was in an arcade in London (The Trocadero for those in the know) and that they had a large Sing Star machine, and I got up there to play against a stranger and a large crowd gathered round to chant my name and hoist me up on their shoulders. It is actually getting to the point that I might considering buying a video game system just to play sing star. That is just plain messed up. I hate video games. Because they are competitive and require hand eye coordination, which is not one of my skills (nor is hand, foot... hence the soccer bench warming). Regardless, let's just say that if I was to ever play you in Sing Star, I would murder you.


Now, as for #2. This is my dirty little secret. I only copped to it out loud for the first time yesterday while speaking to Ethan Cushing (www.ethancushing.com). About a month ago, ethan had challenged me to blog more often, and I agreed that it was probably a good idea, considering that I make money off of being a writer and I should be keeping my skills sharp. Also I have no hobbies. None. I don't even knit. So Blogging for a few minutes each day shouldn't really put a strain on the rest of my life activities. However, even after promising Ethan that I would blog with regularity, I felt uncompelled to do so. Until my friend Sarah did. (See Sarah Crosland's blog link on my sidebar.... just don't click it yet).

You see, Sarah and I are great buds. The best in fact. We were roommates for two years plus one summer. We can laugh about dumb, stupid things that no one else understands (Cheesy Delights!) and we speak a secret language of shared memories that will forever bond us in a most warm, loving way. Anyone who has lived with us or near us will tell you that our particular brand of togetherness can be downright exclusive and annoying... which just makes us that much more proud of it. Damn! Love that girl.

But, as it would happen, we are also both professional writers, which means, of course....

girlfriend is goin' down.

Understand, I don't mean to compete with Sarah. In fact, I shouldn't even bother. She is naturally funnier than I am (her self deprecation is so honed that it is like a fine art). Weird stuff happens to her like, daily, which makes for much better blog fodder (see the entry about her post man, and the part of her most recent entry that involves a man spitting peanut pieces on her on his way to rehab). Also, she went to journalism school which gives her blog a bit of professional credibility that mine just will never have. I've got a few big names on my resume, but she's got better job titles on hers. I have a few more published years than she does, but that just means that she caught up with me in less time, which gives her the edge again. There is even one magazine that we BOTH write for, and her name goes above mine in the masthead (that might have something to do with it being alphabetical.... but still!) As you can see, despite my deep unabiding love for this girl, I have these bubbling feelings of competitive rage and there is only one logical place for me to let them have their day: the blogosphere.

My blogs will never be as funny or readable as hers are, and I won't waste my key strokes trying to beat her there. No, this is about sheer quantity. Everytime I see that she has put up a new post, I feel compelled to immediately sit down and hammer out my own. And UGH! when she gets TWO up before I get up my next one it makes me want punch a wall! Like a dude! So yes Ethan. I will post more often. But not because I am inspired by creativity.... but because I am determined to stay pace for pace, post for post with Sarah Crosland until I have blogged her into submission.

If you are still reading this... thank you. Because I am assuming that most of you clicked on Sarah's blog a few paragraphs ago and never came back. You are probably going to want to bookmark her blog instead of mine. It's alright. No one can blame you. She is also like 5'10" blond and gorgeous, so you know. Ugh. (Love her though. seriously. besties forever.)


*** For those of you interested in following this one-sided (at least so far it is one sided... she hasn't read this yet) fight, you might be interested to know that starting Saturday, Sarah and I will be sharing one hotel internet connection for an entire week, which means that if we are going to competiblog, we will actually have to shove each other out of the way to access the computer to do it. This could get interesting, very very quickly.***